お風呂が住処の日記

visibility73 chat2 person退会したユーザー edit2023.11.22

ngl, I'm a bit thrown off…

I've talked with different ppl on different platforms.
Normally, there's a bunch of ppl from all over the world there and once I start talking in english, either they(jp) leave or start telling me how much they hate english then leave. Some of them start overly complimenting my english and then leave.

When I meet new ppl(jp) while I'm with my foreign friends, they reckon me as one them. Then once I start talking in jp they say things like "oh your japanese is good!." But then, once I tell them that I'm actually japanese, they either leave or block me. (This made me feel like I'm an imposter)

Some ppl don't leave me though, they(both jp and non-jp) instead use me either as an interpreter or a text book. They never hesitate to ask(order?) me to translate and I end up being responsible for navigating the entire conversation. I had no guts to turn down cuz enough number of ppl had already left me. Even when they don't ask, I couldn't just stand and watch conversations not going well so I voluntary offer myself as a interpreter.

This, probably won't be much of a burden if I were a native english speaker but I am not. Yet, there's another reason why I'm insecure about my japanese. Countless times, I got picked on because of the way I talk in japanese. I tried so hard to fix it but I couldn't. One of my friend even told me "I don't think you can ever fix that within your lifetime so don't bother."

…ok I can't type further here,

star今日よかったこと♪

So, long story short, I'm finally feeling comfortable being who I am here. People are nice regardless of the language I speak and they don't judge me. I'm so grateful for this. Never thought I can

favorite読んでくれた人へのメッセージ

find a place like this. This platform maybe the start of my new life where I don't have to worry about languages I speak. Also, not having to be a free interpreter feels great, such a relief. Arigatoo

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